Long Hollow

Wouldn't it be fun to answer "Imagineer" on forms asking your occupation?

I've spent the past few days filling out applications and sending my eclectic resume off with a prayer into internet-land.

"Are you our Imagineer?" was the title of one job post, and I thought "Yes! Yes, I believe I am!" I'm still waiting to see if they think so, too. So far no response. Sigh. 

I gave it my best shot trying to make ends meet with my extensive collection of part-time jobs, but it just wasn't enough, and I'm now actively looking for a real job. Not just a job, but a career that could last for years and years and years (which is kind of funny since many of my friends are counting down the days to their retirement!)

I'm looking for something that interests me, that doesn't make me writhe in anticipatory agony when I think of it, something that makes me feel I'm using and expanding my gifts. In the past those have always been jobs where I felt I was helping people and making a difference in the world.

But beggars can't be choosers, and although it can be colored and phrased in different ways, I feel we've technically crossed into begging territory.

I really don't like it. It's been a lesson in humility, one I guess I needed, but I'm ready for class to be over. So I'm sending off applications for just about anything I'm even loosely qualified for.

That's one of the problems… meeting the requirements. Many of the jobs I see that would interest me, and that I know I would do well at, require a college degree. Strike one. I anticipate strike two to be my age, and strike three to be my helter-skelter work background.

I'm not actually pessimistic about finding a job, though. I have that rumbly feeling inside that I get when I'm on the edge of an adventure, about to step through a new door. I feel God is leading me, just as I've always felt, and while I have no idea why my path continues to zig-zag, circle, and sometimes even backtrack, I trust that he has a reason for it. That's all that really matters.

So I'll just keep walking, one footstep at a time, knowing he's got the trip covered. 

This doesn't mean I'm putting my writing or my camera on a shelf. My drums might get a little dusty, but I'll keep working on my book and my blogs… continue with my freelance photography gigs… stick with Silpada and the winery… and I'm not even giving up on my personal history business. I enjoy all of them too much.

But they're like the floaties you put on your kids to keep them from drowning. Despite wearing all of them and treading my ass off in the water, we're just too heavy. We're sinking. We need a rescue boat that can get us back to dry land, ASAP!

Wish me luck! (And feel free to send me job links and tips! But only for jobs with benefits and paid vacation. I haven't had a paid day off in 15 years!)

Michael Franti's song "Hey, Hey, Hey…" was the basis for my 2011 New Year's Resolution.

It's still a great reminder that this moment we're in right now is the first step to our future, and the only one we have any control over. We shouldn't waste it.

 And now for a few sweet moments of the week… 

Sunday: catching up with friends after church; time in the car with your baby girl; husbands who can fix just about anything

Monday: a country joining together to remember and give thanks for those who sacrificed their lives to guard our freedoms; a day off with your husband; the red flash of a cardinal in the trees; progress on your book

Tuesday: living in a democracy, with the freedom to vote; running for 34 minutes when you didn't think you'd make it past 5; strawberries for dinner

Wednesday: feeling like a writer; a baby smiling at you with a wrinkled-nose, exposing two tiny teeth, while you wait in line at the drugstore; a puppy waiting for you on the doorstep when you get home; a long catch-up call from your oldest

Thursday: sunshine when your heart is cloudy; finding a lucky penny; a call from your sister; having your mom just a phone call away; friends you can talk to about anything; being able to wish your mom-in-law a happy birthday; in-person hugs from 2/3 of your kids; an errand day when everything falls together like clockwork

Friday: watching Romeo and Juliet in a high school class (skipping the love scene, don't worry) and flashing back to the first time you saw it in 1976, on a date at the Midnight Movies in downtown Houston; job ideas from friends; laughing at old episodes of "Dark Shadows" with your son; a text from your oldest with a promise for a visit

Saturday: setting teensy baby mice free in the woods (photos later); brick oven pizza; watermelon-cucumber soup; getting caught up on workplace drama; Mountain Pinks beginning to bloom

Sunday: attending Mass with your son; bags of home grown tomatoes and onions from a friend

My Sweet! list is like a bouquet of flowers I collect for myself.

Instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers, why don't you gather your own bouquet? ~ unknown

I hope each week you discover enough sweet! moments scattered among the not-so-sweet to create your own bouquet.

Share them here!