•  

     

    Stand up for Peace

     

    I think it's time, don't you?

    Somewhere I read that everything we do, every simple action or word, sends an energy into the world, either positive or negative, ultimately contributing to either war or peace.

    We can point fingers and lay blame, but to some degree each one of us carries that responsibility and power.

    I believe Thomas Merton wrote it in "The Seven Storey Mountain ", although I haven't been able to find it again. But no matter who wrote it, it stuck with me…the image of our complaints, our smiles, our angry outbursts, our words of thanks or apology drifting away from us and taking sides in a cosmic dance of good and evil. 

    When my kids were little, I advised them to use a simple test for their words and actions – is it "nice" or "necessary"? If neither, don't say it or do it.

     

    In light of the recent violent events in Paris and California and, well, almost everywhere in the world … especially in the increasing intensity and frequency of those events … I'm going to take my own advice and refocus my efforts to contribute to the 'good' side more than the bad, especially when I'm driving in traffic, which I think is my biggest challenge!

    I hope you join me!

     

    "Let us not use bombs and guns to overcome the world. Let us use love and compassion. Peace begins with a smile. Smile five times a day at someone you don't really want to smile at at all. Do it for peace. Let us radiate the peace of God and so light His light and extinguish in the world and in the hearts of all men all hatred and love for power. Smile at one another. It is not always easy. Sometimes I find it hard to smile at my Sister, but then I pray.

    God loves the world through you and me. Are we that love and that compassion?"

    ~Mother Theresa, "In the Heart of the World: Thoughts, Stories, and Prayers "

     

  • First came love…

     

    Me and tom dam b jan 82

     

    Then came marriage…

     

    Tom and me wedding 1982

     Then came Tommy in a baby carriage!

    (After a few years of pre-children fun, of course. And a new perm.)

     

    Tom, Tommy, and me carriage

     

    Okay, you can’t really see Tommy in that one, but trust me, he’s in there.

    Here’s a better one.

     

    Me and Tommy
     

    Oh my gosh, isn’t he precious?

     

    He’s come a long way… from slides on his first birthday…

     

    With tom and birthday slide

     

    …to bungee-jumping in New Zealand on his 30th.

    This is afterward. I appreciate them letting everyone know they survived!

    (He’s the one in front on the right.)

     

    Survived bungee jumping

     

    Happy 30th anniversary of Tom and me becoming parents, and happy 30th birthday to my oldest baby

     

  •  

    It’s the hardest thing to give away
    And the last thing on your mind today
    It always goes to those that don’t deserve

    It’s the opposite of how you feel
    When the pain they caused is just too real
    It takes everything you have just to say the word…

    Forgiveness
    Forgiveness

    ~from "Forgiveness" by Matthew West

     

    Can you imagine getting the news that your college-student son had been shot to death? For me, I believe it would be an all-consuming fire of heartbreak at the loss and anger at the action. 

    In 1995 Azim Khamisa, an international investment banker in San Diego at the time, did receive that news: his only son was killed by an aspiring teenage gang member.

    Azim surely felt heartache and anger, but he reacted in a way that shocked everyone – he forgave the killer, reached out to the killer's family, and even befriended the killer's grandfather. Despite his pain, he recognized the killer's family must be feeling pain and loss, as well.

    After all, can you imagine getting the news that your teenage grandson had shot and killed someone?

    Together Azim and the grandfather worked to bring something positive from their joint tragedy, launching an organization that teaches nonviolence in middle schools.  

    When writer Megan Feldman Bettencourt heard about Azim from a friend who attended one of his speaking engagements, she wanted to learn more. Why did he forgive? How did he forgive? 

    Like many, she tended to equate forgiveness with weakness. With a little research, she discovered that multiple studies have shown forgiveness can not only improve physical and emotional well-being, but may even be a survival skill developed through evolution.

    And that was the seed for a journey that ultimately became a book: Triumph of the Heart: Forgiveness in an Unforgiving World

    In the book Megan shares her own struggles with forgiveness which most of us can identify with, such as the hurt caused by bad relationships or the verbal abuse of a bully. That kind of pain doesn't compare to what Azim felt, but it can often seem impossible to forgive even the simplest affronts like these, can't it? There were times in the book when I felt too much space was given to her past relationship, but the reason for it became clear by the end. 

    Megan traveled throughout the United States and even to Rwanda to try to get answers to some questions she had about forgiveness. For example, was forgiveness self-sacrificial and altruistic? Was it possible after extreme offenses, such as genocide? Was it natural? Did it provide health benefits? How important are apologies and redemption? Is it a one-time thing or a habit? Can communities and nations practice forgiveness?

    She shares the stories of the people she meets along the way, from Azim to recovered addicts to couples trying to heal their marriages. But the most amazing stories to me are those from Rwanda, especially the one of Father Ubald, a priest whose entire family was killed and who barely escaped Rwanda alive himself following the conflict between the Hutus and the Tutsis. 

    Father Ubald is actually helping to raise the children of the man who killed his mother, even paying for one daughter to attend medical school, while the killer is in prison.  His story is on page 206. You really need to read it. 

    His is just one of many amazing stories in that country, though. He runs a program that helps other victims forgive, including the son of a victim who ultimately made his father's killer the godfather of one of his children. If they can forgive the atrocities committed against them to this extent, what excuse do I have to hold on to bitterness and anger?

    While spirituality plays a part in forgiveness for many people, this isn't a spiritual book. It's an exploration about the benefits of forgiveness, both physical and social, and about the process. It's rarely, if ever, a one-time thing, but something that needs to be practiced, as Megan says, "like being optimistic or mindful or patient." It can ebb and flow, from day to day. 

    Megan investigated and describes to us many of the forgiveness programs in place around the United States and in Rwanda to help the process. 

    It's a shame I hadn't heard of any of them until I read this book, and I hope that changes. I believe forgiveness is not only the key to personal peace, health, and happiness, but also the key to peace everywhere. And that's why I feel this book is full of hope.

     

    As I walked out the door toward the gate that would lead to my freedom,

    I knew if I didn't leave my bitterness and hatred behind,

    I'd still be in prison.

    ~ Nelson Mandela

     

    Triumph of the Heart
     

    Disclosure: I was given a copy of this book to review, but the opinions are my own. The link up above is to Amazon and, as an Amazon Associate, I do receive a few pennies if you order the book there. But no matter where you order it, I encourage you to get this book, read it, and share it. I believe its message is important and potentially life-saving.  Thank you, Megan!

    And here are the rest of the lyrics to the Matthew West song "Forgiveness", just because they fit so well…

     

    It’s the hardest thing to give away
    And the last thing on your mind today
    It always goes to those that don’t deserve

    It’s the opposite of how you feel
    When the pain they caused is just too real
    It takes everything you have just to say the word…

    Forgiveness
    Forgiveness

    It flies in the face of all your pride
    It moves away the mad inside
    It’s always anger’s own worst enemy
    Even when the jury and the judge
    Say you gotta right to hold a grudge
    It’s the whisper in your ear saying ‘Set It Free’

    Forgiveness, Forgiveness
    Forgiveness, Forgiveness

    Show me how to love the unlovable
    Show me how to reach the unreachable
    Help me now to do the impossible

    Forgiveness, Forgiveness

    Help me now to do the impossible
    Forgiveness

    It’ll clear the bitterness away
    It can even set a prisoner free
    There is no end to what it’s power can do
    So, let it go and be amazed
    By what you see through eyes of grace
    The prisoner that it really frees is you

    Forgiveness, Forgiveness
    Forgiveness, Forgiveness

    Show me how to love the unlovable
    Show me how to reach the unreachable
    Help me now to do the impossible
    Forgiveness

    I want to finally set it free
    So show me how to see what Your mercy sees
    Help me now to give what You gave to me
    Forgiveness, Forgiveness

  •  

    DSC_0441

     

    Let us come to him with thanksgiving. Let us sing psalms of praise to him. - Psalm 95:2 (NLT)

    I sit here at my computer tonight, listening to the rain falling outside my window. I'm still full from roasted turkey and lots of carbs:  cornbread dressing (my mom's recipe); green bean casserole (doesn't really count as a vegetable, but my kids love it); jellied cranberry (an homage to my dad); and, of course, small slices of pumpkin and pecan pie.

    It was just four of us … me, Tom, and two of the kids, since the oldest and his wife are exploring New Zealand. A white tablecloth covered my table, with a silver and gold runner. No fancy or creative centerpiece, but I set the table with silver chargers and my wedding china (Noritake Shenandoah, which I still absolutely adore) and sipped wine from my wedding crystal, which most of the time sits gathering dust in my china cabinet.

    It was the first time the four of us had sat down to eat at the same time in a very long while. We are all too busy these days, home at odd hours and living mostly on frozen pizza.

    After dinner, we called Tom's mom , then piled into the car to visit Mama and watch a few episodes of "The Facts of Life" with her. Knowing she would be full from her own Thanksgiving dinner (they have great food at her nursing home!) I only brought her a little bit of the cornbread dressing, hoping for her stamp of approval… which she gave before gobbling it up. Whew!

    That's already enough to be grateful for , but there's so much more. Lately, when I find myself veering off into a 'poor me' whine, I've tried to redirect it into some kind of "thank you". It usually isn't too hard!

    However, even though I give thanks often, I think a national holiday specifically dedicated to giving thanks for our blessings, motivating us to pull the special china out of the closet and spend hours in the kitchen trying to re-create our mother's cornbread dressing and sitting down with our family for the first time in months… or to gather with others to fill plates with turkey and dressing for those who don't have a home, much less a china cabinet, as friends of mine did today.

    I was reminded this morning at Mass that I have George Washington to thank for giving us this national holiday of Thanksgiving. Thank you, George!

    For his homily, our priest read us the original proclamation, which I don't think I had ever heard before. In case you haven't either, or if it's been awhile since you have, I decided to find it online and share it here…

     

    Thanksgiving Proclamation

    Issued by President George Washington, at the request of Congress, on October 3, 1789

    By the President of the United States of America, a Proclamation.

    Whereas it is the duty of all nations to acknowledge the providence of Almighty God, to obey His will, to be grateful for His benefits, and humbly to implore His protection and favor; and—Whereas both Houses of Congress have, by their joint committee, requested me “to recommend to the people of the United States a day of public thanksgiving and prayer, to be observed by acknowledging with grateful hearts the many and signal favors of Almighty God, especially by affording them an opportunity peaceably to establish a form of government for their safety and happiness:”

    Now, therefore, I do recommend and assign Thursday, the 26th day of November next, to be devoted by the people of these States to the service of that great and glorious Being who is the beneficent author of all the good that was, that is, or that will be; that we may then all unite in rendering unto Him our sincere and humble thanks for His kind care and protection of the people of this country previous to their becoming a nation; for the signal and manifold mercies and the favor, able interpositions of His providence in the course and conclusion of the late war; for the great degree of tranquillity, union, and plenty which we have since enjoyed; for the peaceable and rational manner in which we have been enabled to establish constitutions of government for our safety and happiness, and particularly the national one now lately instituted; for the civil and religious liberty with which we are blessed, and the means we have of acquiring and diffusing useful knowledge; and, in general, for all the great and various favors which He has been pleased to confer upon us.

    And also that we may then unite in most humbly offering our prayers and supplications to the great Lord and Ruler of Nations, and beseech Him to pardon our national and other trangressions; to enable us all, whether in public or private stations, to perform our several and relative duties properly and punctually; to render our National Government a blessing to all the people by constantly being a Government of wise, just, and constitutional laws, discreetly and faithfully executed and obeyed; to protect and guide all sovereigns and nations (especially such as have shown kindness to us), and to bless them with good governments, peace, and concord; to promote the knowledge and practice of true religion and virtue, and the increase of science among them and us; and, generally, to grant unto all mankind such a degree of temporal prosperity as He alone knows to be best.

    Given under my hand at the City of New York the third day of October in the year of our Lord 1789.

    Go. Washington

    Front nov. 2015

     

    From our home to yours… Happy Thanksgiving!

    Dear Lord; we beg but one boon more:
    Peace in the hearts of all men living,
    peace in the whole world this Thanksgiving.
    ~Joseph Auslander

  •  

    Wm-3325

     

    My oldest and his beautiful wife are somewhere over the Pacific Ocean right now, traveling to New Zealand with another couple for a trip of a lifetime, one they've dreamed about for years. I would say "the" trip of a lifetime, but these two have already spent Oktoberfest in Munich, honeymooned in Italy, and traveled to Moscow, hitting a lot of other countries and big cities along the way.

    They've already had some "trips of a lifetime" and have many more ahead of them, but this will be the only one where my baby celebrates his 30th birthday by bungee-jumping in a foreign country. 

    (Of course, at the most basic 'mother' level inside of me, that totally freaks me out! But mostly, I'm over-the-top excited for them, and so grateful for Facebook because I'll be able to keep tabs on them and experience the trip virtually, all at the same time.)

    The photo above was taken at a surprise party Kirby threw for him last weekend. Somehow, he didn't have a clue beforehand.

    Wm-3309

    Wm-3327
     

    Can you believe all of these people (including me) kept their mouths shut about it? I'm still amazed.

    I won custody of my grandpuppy Josie while they are away, thank goodness, even from their friends who will be vacationing in Austin and house-sitting for them while they are gone. Josie's in high demand, but grandmas get first dibs! 

    Tommy met me at Mama's for the pass-off, so she could get a visit in with both of them, too. 

    IMG_3381

     

    Belle enjoys having her here, and Josie is having lots of fun being a country dog. 

    Wm-3385

     

     Last weekend was one birthday celebration after another, beginning with my mom's on Friday night. It was the first time in a long while she was with all of her kids. I was negligent about taking photos that night, but we did manage to get one of all of us together around the birthday cake my sister baked.

    Wm-4595

     

    Mama asked for fried shrimp for her birthday dinner, and I knew that meant Gulf shrimp, not some teensy popcorn shrimp, so I was worried, because we are no where near the Gulf!

    But thanks to Facebook friends, I discovered there are actually several places in Austin that serve good fried Gulf shrimp. Whew! If your Mama wants fried shrimp for her birthday, you want her to have fried shrimp.

    Wm-3300

     

    After the surprise party on Saturday night, half of the group headed to the Container Bar on Rainey Street to continue the celebration, and I tagged along because, hey, it was my celebration, too, of the 30th anniversary of my becoming a mother!  

    The Container Bar is just that… a bar that is actually made out of industrial shipping containers! What a great idea!

    Wm-3359

     

    In true Austin style, we shared a space with a group of guys on a bachelor party weekend, with the groom-to-be dressed as Snow White, for some reason, and his friends dressed as dwarves, with fake beards, pointy hats, and obscure names on the backs of their shirts.

    Wm-3348
     

    Tommy took me on a tour through the containers, and when I spotted this wall, I had to have a photo, cheesy or not.

    In a crowded bar, that was no easy feat, but he did it somehow…

    Wm-3361

    Wm-3362

     

    On Monday evening I was back downtown to celebrate Kirby's birthday at the Saxon Pub with a Bob Schneider concert. We had great seats at a table close to the stage, shared with a couple from California who loved Austin and had friends in Colorado who were wanting information on Austin real estate.

    Lucky for them I had some business cards handy!

    Bob Schneider was excellent, as always…

    Wm-3367
     

    …and since we were so close to the Highball and it was Motown Monday, how could we not go there and dance to the Nightowls until 1 am? After all, it was Kirby's birthday!

    If you ever get a chance to hear them, don't miss it!

    Wm-3372

     

     

    It was a wonderful weekend…week…spent celebrating people I love and special events in my life. What could be better?

    "Nothing in the world is permanent, and we're foolish when we ask anything to last, but surely we're still more foolish not to take delight in it while we have it."

    ~ W. Somerset Maugham

  •  

    Baby velma muriel
     "You must have been a beautiful baby…" ~Johnny Mercer

     

     

    Last week I asked my mom what she wanted for her birthday. She stared off for a few seconds, then looked at me and said "More time."

    But there was a twinkle in her eye, and her mouth turned up in a grin as she added, "Can you tell I live in the present?"

    What a wise woman. 

    Even now, anchored to an oxygen machine, rarely leaving the small room she shares with another woman, and having to rely on others for even the simplest things, like having a glass of water near enough to drink, Mama finds enough joy in life to want to stick around awhile longer.

    I know it isn't because she's afraid of death. My mom is a Christian. She has taught me all my life – and I know she believes it most of the time – that there is life after death, much more beautiful than this one, free of pain and sorrow. Most of her loved ones have gone before her…her parents, siblings, her firstborn, and her beloved husband.  

    Despite what her life appears to be to us, she is still loving it. Her smile is always close to the surface, and she laughs often, finding joy in the simplest things. She loves her aides and nurses, her cups of coffee, her cookies, and the photos of Daddy, her kids, grandkids, and great-granddaughter hanging on the walls.

    She does NOT like being told what to do, but that's understandable after years of being such an independent woman and caregiver to others.

    For her sake – actually, for mine – I hope she gets her birthday wish, and that she finds joy in every extra second she is given. I believe she will. I know I will.

    And in her honor, I will try my best not to waste a single second of the time I'm given with remorse or regrets of the past, or with wishing away my today for some future moment that may never come.

    And I will continue to keep my eyes open for even the simplest sweet!s. Today they will include picking up some fried shrimp for her birthday dinner, then gathering with family to celebrate her and give thanks that she's in our lives.

     

    Velma pitts about 17 croppedsign

     

    On her 77th birthday, I listed the things she had taught me, and I've added to it every year. So without further ado, here's the list…

    Things Mama has taught me…

    1. it's never too late to learn something new
    2. if you have a choice between laughter and tears, choose laughter.
    3. don't let anyone mess with your babies!
    4. only give advice when asked for it (I'm still working on that one)
    5. pray every day
    6. pray some more
    7. reading a good book might not solve your problems, but it's a nice escape from them
    8. bend but never break
    9. some people are just takers
    10. be nice whenever possible, but sometimes nice doesn't cut it
    11. take care of family
    12. we're all individuals – let your kids blossom into themselves, not "mini-me's"
    13. be there
    14. Johnny Weismuller is the best movie Tarzan
    15. don't be in a rush to be older than you are – you're only going to be this age once in your life
    16. if you like something, and you'll use it, and you can afford it, then buy it, or you'll regret it later
    17. quality over quantity
    18. never think "can't"
    19. people will stand in line for a dead skunk if it's free
    20. roll with the punches
    21. have fun
    22. laugh often
    23. believe in yourself
    24. don't let others change who you are
    25. be honest
    26. don't steal
    27. forgive yourself
    28. God loves me
    29. don't judge
    30. just do it!
    31. inside matters more than outside
    32. don't use God's name in vain
    33. you can learn anything if you put your mind to it
    34. you're never too old to dance
    35. it's okay to ask for help
    36. show appreciation and express gratitude
    37. use my manners
    38. consider the source
    39. an office or position of authority should be respected, but the individual in that position has to earn your respect
    40. sleep is good
    41. take advantage of opportunities
    42. keep your eyes open and your wits about you
    43. people aren't always nice
    44. things can't make you happy
    45. use your imagination
    46. just get started and the rest will be easy
    47. don't be intimidated by anyone – we're all the same, all human, we all have strengths and weaknesses
    48. you can love someone even if you don't like them
    49. forgive but don't forget
    50. learn from others' mistakes
    51. there are times for being patient, and time for putting your foot down
    52. speak up
    53. stand up for what you believe in
    54. admit your mistakes and expect others to do the same
    55. persistance pays off
    56. let your kids be kids
    57. love unconditionally
    58. take lots of pictures
    59. kids grow up fast
    60. your kids need a mother, not another friend
    61. pets are family
    62. help others
    63. a sense of humor is essential for sanity and survival
    64. if you look close enough, you can find something to love about everyone
    65. coffee is good anytime
    66. messes can be cleaned up
    67. prayer works
    68. God is strong all the time – let him carry you
    69. if you say you're going to do something, do it
    70. be nice to yourself in case no one else is
    71. you have to show respect to get respect
    72. girls are tough
    73. don't put up with temper tantrums – yours or someone else's
    74. listen to your body – doctors don't know everything
    75. don't say everything you're thinking
    76. asking questions is the best way to learn something
    77. your babies are always your babies (and their babies are your babies, too!)
    78. God is
    79. Just listen. 
    80. people are more important than things
    81. there is a time to help others, and a time to let others help you
    82. God has his reasons, and He will give you whatever strength you need for the road ahead…and never leave you to walk it alone.
    83. smile and show appreciation to those who are willing to help you – they may have it tougher than you in many ways
    84. Appreciate every second you're given, because life is beautiful.

     

    DSC_0279(from last year's celebration) 

    They're not gray hairs. They're wisdom highlights.

    ~Author Unknown

     P.S. Happy Friday the 13th anniversary to my husband!

  • They are all around you, disguised as ordinary people. They may be generous or grouchy, quiet or boisterous, socialites or loners.  They come in all colors, sizes, and ages. They are our veterans… those who gave anywhere from three to thirty years of their lives, doing whatever our country needed them to do, wherever they were told to go. 

    Tonight our church held a special dinner in their honor; at the end, each veteran was asked to give their name and tell a little about their service. I felt very humbled and grateful. My mind naturally drifted to those veterans I hold most dear, and I realized I hadn't yet published my annual tribute to them…

     

     

    "Lord, if your people need me, I will not refuse the work. Your will be done."

    ~St. Martin of Tours

    Buster, heading to vietnam, and me

     

    My big brother Buster was headed to Viet Nam, saying his goodbyes, when I stood beside him in this photograph and smiled. I had no idea what was ahead of him. This was probably taken before his first tour of duty and so he had only a vague idea himself what to expect.

    When he volunteered for his second tour, however, he knew full well what he was stepping into…but he did it anyway. 

     

    Daddy Navy young cropped

     

    My dad was in high school when the Japanese attacked Pearl Harbor. He joined the Navy soon after high school graduation because his country was at war and "it was the thing to do." 

    In the next twenty-two months he traveled a long way from Texas aboard the U.S.S. Geneva…to places like the Philippines, the Marshall Islands, China, Burma, Japan.

    Before he turned twenty, he had seen cities that had been destroyed by war and piles of dead bodies waiting to be buried. 

    A few years later, his little brother Bobby followed his lead and joined the Navy, and many years later, so did my brother Donnie and two nephews.

     

    Mom and pop in uniform

    Mom, pop and boys

    Pop, my wonderful father-in-law, missed out on World War II, but joined the Air Force in time for the Korean War. He worked base supply in Okinawa, supporting bombers flying missions to Korea…about 100 aircraft every day.

    He re-enlisted, got married, and hopped around the globe…living in England, Germany, and over a year in Pakistan, separated from his family (the other heroes – Mom had 8 teenage and younger boys to deal with by herself!)…visiting a dozen other countries…eventually staying put for awhile in Maryland, working with NSA (and a second job at the bowling alley to make ends meet), until his retirement.

    A lifetime of service and sacrifice for this country.

     

    Tom in Kodiak

    Tom and crew including David

     

    My husband Tom was raised in that military family. For him it was normal to move every few years to someplace completely different…by the time he was eight or nine years old, he had lived in three countries!

    He grew up on a tight budget … hand-me-downs, powdered milk and only two cookies a day…period! And yet as soon as he could, he joined the service…the Coast Guard. Among other things, he helped rescue fisherman off the coast of Alaska.

    Four of his brothers also joined the service (three career Air Force, just like their dad, and another Coast Guard) and the youngest joined the Army Reserves. Now the next generation is following in their footsteps: two Air Force and one Coast Guard, plus numerous cousins, nieces, and nephews. 

    I think it's very fitting that Veterans Day shares November with Thanksgiving, a day when we slow down to remember and be grateful for things that we usually take for granted, because veterans, despite the sacrifices they make for all of us, probably don't even make it onto our Thanksgiving thank-you list.

    That's how much most of us take them for granted – as well as the freedoms they protect for us. Even when our country isn't at war, they go where they are needed to unfamiliar places, away from extended family, often living on a minimum salary.

    To many, they are a symbol of war, not peace, and sadly become targets of derision, scorn, blame… and even violence, like the sad incident at Ft. Hood a few years ago.

    They deserve to be thanked every day of the year. A friend of mine says that when he's in a restaurant and sees a man or woman in uniform, he secretly pays their bill. What a wonderful idea! I think more of us should go out of our way every day to show our appreciation, but I'm glad there is at least one special day where we shine a spotlight on them, remember their sacrifices and make clear our gratitude.

    Thank you Daddy, Tom, Pop, Buster, Donnie, Uncle Bobby, Uncle Howard, Kenny, Steve, Joe, Robbie, John, Sheila, Michael, Tom, Lynn, Robbin, Evan, James…and all of the other Veterans, past and present, out there! Because of you, we're free to go about our daily lives, without a thought in the world to how much that freedom costs or how much you've given.

    "Freedom is never free."  ~Author Unknown

    But let's hope we do remember the price, as well as those who, through their actions, say, "Don't worry. I got this."

    Many at tonight's dinner brought up, with much pride, the current service of their sons and daughters, which reminded me of TG's boyfriend's Air Force graduation back in September. He's from a military family himself – his parents met while they were both in the Army. He's well aware of the commitment he's made.

    So I'd like to thank TG's B and all of the others who are continuing to step up to fill those ranks for our country. I hope we all continue to show them the support they deserve. 

    Wm-2404

     

    "This nation will remain the land of the free only so long as it is the home of the brave."

     ~Elmer Davis

     

  •  

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    Yes, I realize we're already a third of the way through November, but I'm still recovering from October. Was it just me, or did October take more than it's fair share of the year? It seemed much longer than 31 days. 

    Granted, my October dance card was not just full, but taking backups. But still… "busy" usually makes time pass faster, as in "Gosh, where did October go?" (That's the way November is for me right now, just flying by. Slow it down!)

     

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    But this year, even though it's one of my favorite months - if not THE favorite - by the end of it I was saying "It's still October??" 

     

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    I mean, really, who can resist October? The weather is usually perfect – warm days, cool evenings, low humidity. (At least here in the Texas hill country.)

    There's a golden glow over everything, including the purple and yellow wildflowers that flourish along the roadsides. It's like spring sprinkled with fairy dust.

     

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    And this October couldn't have started any better, with that gorgeous weather and my annual women's weekend in Port Aransas.

     

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    The beautiful weather held on for our church's annual Oktoberfest the next weekend. 

    As if that wasn't enough, less than a week later, I boarded a plane for the first time in more than a decade, headed for Chicago to help celebrate a friend's daughter's wedding. Again…beautiful weather, albeit quite a few degrees cooler.

     

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    I experienced my first real deep-dish Chicago-style pizza. YUM!

    Then just a few days after my return home, three dear friends visited Austin. Gray clouds and drizzle had replaced the blue skies, but it didn't stop us from getting together at some yummy restaurants for plenty of catching up. 

     

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    However, by the time Sunday rolled around, the rain had not only continued to fall, but it had broken records! My excitement over finally seeing Elton John perform live waned in direct proportion to the number of inches that fell.

    I had imagined his concert under a gorgeous, star-filled Texas-in-autumn sky, not under an umbrella, shivering, stomping around in mud. 

    So when my compadres changed their minds about going, I wasn't that upset about staying home. I needed to write up an offer for clients, anyway, which probably doesn't seem like much fun to you, but is pretty dang exciting for me!

    I'm sure exhaustion and age played a huge part in our decisions, and the terrible weather just pushed us over the edge. My friends were both in Chicago with me (one was the mother of the bride!)

    Plus business went bonkers for me in October – yay! No complaints there! New clients, new contracts, closings… all answers to many prayers, and despite falling splat into the middle of such a crazy-busy month, I was – and still am – very grateful.

     

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    October was as full of emotional extremes as it was weather extremes. There were all of these good times with friends, but I also gathered with friends to grieve.

    There was Father Joe's death. He had helped guide me into the Catholic Church. I could talk to him about anything.

    Then my ex-brother-in-law became seriously ill and spent days in ICU. Despite his flaws, he remains one of my favorite people and probably the funniest person I know, and I've been really worried about him. He's home now, but I'm not sure he's getting better.

    Before October took its final bow, a dear friend's mom passed away unexpectedly. She was one of our childhood moms, who had watched us grow from elementary school slumber parties to proms to being moms ourselves, hosting slumber parties for our own kids. I made an overnight trip to Houston for the funeral, stopping by my own childhood home before heading back to Austin. 

     

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    I'm still trying to pay attention to the sweet!s in my life, and since my phone (essentially, my office!) rarely leaves my hand, I've been doing it more and more through photos, posting to Instagram and Facebook, and sometimes through words on a list on my phone. 

    So here are a few more from the end of October…

    Letting your puppy talk you into walking before the sun is up so you catch the first glow of sunrise … a glimpse of zebras in the Texas Hill Country … a roadrunner crossing in front of you … a full moon waiting up for you … clouds painting the sky…

     

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    Pink clouds…

     

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    A surprise in the mail from Jennifer at Ripplespeak... 

     

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    And the welcoming glow of home.

     

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    May your November already be overflowing in sweet!s!

    Then summer fades and passes, and October comes. Will smell smoke then, and feel an unsuspected sharpness, a thrill of nervous, swift elation, a sense of sadness and departure.

    ~Thomas Wolfe

  •   Meeting Daniel

    My middle son turned 27 today. My "baby" turned 24 this summer and my oldest will be 30 in December. Yikes! 

    I can only imagine how my mom feels, knowing her baby (me) is 56. But I can see in her eyes when she looks at me, even though our roles are somewhat reversed now, that I'm still her baby. 

    Have you read that book, "Love You Forever" by Robert Munsch? 

    Tonight, after TG and I sang "Happy birthday" to Daniel, we were laughing about the mom in the book… well, I don't want to give it away if you haven't read it.  

    Some things never change, and like the mom in the book, my babies will always be my babies, even though they are all taller than me, and more often than not, they are the ones doing the teaching, not me.

    They all know it, too, because I read that book to them over and over and over, laughing and crying every time. 

    If you're a mom and you haven't read it, you need to. But have a tissue handy. I'm serious. 

    "I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, As long as I'm living my baby you'll be."

    Sigh.

    But back to Daniel's birthday…

    For the first time in a long time, I didn't make cyclops cookies. I just didn't have time. I shouldn't even be taking the time to write this now.

    But, hey, you only celebrate the 27th anniversary of your middle child's birth once, right? So I bought him beer, which I hope kind of made up for no cyclops cookies.

     

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    Happy birthday, Daniel! Here's to many, many more!

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    Last weekend I spent a gorgeous weekend in Port Aransas, Texas, with dear friends, old and new. It was something like our 16th annual get-away, but I confess I've lost count.

     

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    There are only about 5 of us who have consistently escaped every year, no matter what was going on in our lives. But every year we have at least 13 women join us, filling three condos that hug the beach. Some are friends of mine from high school. Some are sisters or daughters… or friends of friends. 

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    Once you're in, you're in…until you drop out. And some have actually dropped out! I just don't understand it.

     

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    From upstairs

    I'll never drop out. Not voluntarily, anyway.

    (We recruited a man to take our photo, then another man started taking our photo from a floor above. The owner/residents were so awesome and friendly this year!)

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    Me by Rae

     

    I need this annual retreat to the shore, to recharge and re-energize. (Thanks for this photo, Rae!)

    He that will learn to pray, let him go to sea.

    ~George Herbert

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    I have yet to even look at all the photos I took last weekend, and now another fun weekend is past. Our annual St. Mary's Oktoberfest featured great weather and a miracle win by the Texas Longhorns. (I think Father Joe put in a good word for us!)

     

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    Just one of many beauties in the classic car "show and shine". I dream of having an old truck one day…but mine will need a/c and electric windows. 

     

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    A pet dragon!

     

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    That's the middle school principal you see swimming in the dunking booth. He had a line waiting to dunk him, as you can imagine!

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    I have lots of sweet!s recorded over the past few weeks …

    … a cute couple secretly getting married … your husband and brother-in-law making it home safe from a long canoeing trip in Arkansas … tiny shells on the beach… sharing a room with your sister again  … a morning run on a beach with a cool breeze … a friend texting you to be sure you saw the orange crescent moon rising over the water … sunrise after sunrise after sunrise over the water … slow walks with friends on a beach … dancing … lots of new clients asking for your help…

    But what better way to end this sweet! post than with a photo of your oldest son drinking a beer after running the Chicago marathon? (I wasn't there – he posted it and I stole it to share here!)

    But I'm so proud of him for conquering this challenge! (The marathon, not the beer!)

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    Way to go, Tommy!

     

    I hope you all have a huge collection of sweet!s from the past few weeks, as well! If you don't, you aren't paying attention!

    The unthankful heart… discovers no mercies; but let the thankful heart sweep through the day and, as the magnet finds the iron, so it will find, in every hour, some heavenly blessings!

    ~Henry Ward Beecher