My Uncle Bobby passed away this week. Daddy's younger brother.

Like Daddy and the other men in his family, Uncle Bobby had suffered from heart and vascular problems for years, but it was a slow battle with cancer that took him away. He was a sweet man. In my heart I will always see him smiling, ready to laugh about something. 

That's him in the photo below, wearing my sister's wig, flanked by his son, Jeff, and yours truly, the Tomboy in ripped jeans. 

 


Jeff, uncle bobby, me

I'm grateful that I got to speak to Uncle Bobby a few times recently and assure him of my love and prayers. He called often to check on Daddy after his surgery. I'm glad they got to speak to each other, too.

Jeff stopped by my parents' house on my mom's birthday with a satchel full of old photo albums he'd found at his parents' house that had belonged to our aunt and grandmother. We opened them and stepped back into the years when we were oblivious to time.

When you're young, you can't imagine standing where your parents stand. You never dream that someday you'll be one of those pillars holding up the family, trying to help make decisions about things you had been happily oblivious to just months before.

 


Family circa 1967

 

Now time is tick, tick, ticking in my head. I feel the weight of it on my shoulders. I see, more than I ever did when I first became a mother, that circle of life, and I know that one day my kids will be taking my place as the pillars. 

But I remind myself that, if my kids are as blessed with oblivion as I have been, that time is still years away, and that I need to live each of these days, these years, to the fullest, just as my parents still do, to the best of their abilities.

I can't let the tick-ticking or the weight on my shoulders keep me from noticing blessings like cool old red trucks on display along the highway…

 


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I pass Timeless Texas Classics on my way to and from Houston. Usually I travel too early or too late, and it's locked up. The old cars are tucked safely to bed up near the building.

But this past Wednesday the gate was open and these beauties were lined up close to the road. They smiled and waved at me, but I drove on by, in a hurry and too caught up in all I needed to do once I got home.

Then I realized the gift of the moment and made a U-turn. I spent several minutes walking up and down, snapping their photos, relishing that bit of suspended time.

Old cars and trucks make me smile – especially old trucks painted cherry red like the beauty above. And when you're a pillar – no, especially when you're a pillar – you need to do things that make you smile.

 

It really made me smile to hang out with a bunch of twenty-somethings that same night in honor of my soon-to-be daughter-in-law's 25th birthday. 

 

 
Kirby 25 nov 2012 bw-0101

 

It was a little over six years ago when Tommy went to a friend's cousin's high school graduation party and fell in love. It's hard to believe Kirby was just eighteen when we first met her (and fell in love with her, too.)  

I love that all of my kids are living in Austin now, close enough to wish them happy birthdays in person.

 


Nov 12-0114

Despite the challenges of the past few months, I'm still loving this season of my life.

I haven't been dancing as much as I'd like, but I can still dance. I can still walk down my dirt road and climb hills with my sweetie and puppies. I can hop in the car and meet friends for dinner… when we have time.

Time is the biggest challenge.

I haven't had time to finish my photography website or post new samples to sites where I can sell my photos or a dozen other things I need to do for my business, but this afternoon I get to photograph a beautiful family for the second year in a row. Last year the weather didn't cooperate and we had to take a few shots inside, so this year I'm going prepared with lights I borrowed from a friend, and I've been brushing up on how-to's of indoor portraits. Just in case.

I can still learn.

I'm also preparing for my writer's group meeting tomorrow evening. Thursday I was gloriously stranded at home alone for hours because Tom's car is out of commission and he needed mine to get to work so I spent them working on my children's book. Despite all that time, I barely eked out one short chapter, but I also overhauled my outline and fine tuned previous chapters, things I couldn't have done without several undistracted hours.

The next few chapters should come easier, and that's good, because I'm holding on to my goal of finishing my book by December 19, so I can submit it for critique before February's conference.

 

I hope whatever season of life you're in right now, you live it to its fullest. Let's make a pact not to waste a single moment of this sacred time we've been given… and especially the time we have with our loved ones.

 

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Nothing in the world is permanent, and we're foolish when we ask anything to last, but surely we're still more foolish not to take delight in it while we have it.

~ W. Somerset Maugham

 

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19 responses to “Transitions”

  1. Lady Fi Avatar

    I hear you about the circle of life… Hope you and yours stay in good health and joyful spirits for many years to come.

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  2. Hilary Avatar

    So sorry about the loss of your uncle, Barbara. You sure are having a tough year. Lovely reminder to get the best out of life. Great pics, as always.

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  3. Barbara Shallue Avatar

    Thanks, Hilary. It has been full of challenges, lately, but I still realize I'm blessed to just be going through these challenges now. Many people go through them at a much younger age.

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  4. Barbara Shallue Avatar

    Thanks, and I wish the same for you!
     

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  5. Ms. A Avatar

    Oh, Barbara, I love the photos, both old and new! Time does manage to keep moving forward and I adore the glimpses of the past. Your family will be enjoying your photos for decades, if not longer. Just imagine the records of things you’re making for the future generations!
    Condolences on the loss of your Uncle. Blessings and prayers to your family.

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  6. Gail Dixon Avatar

    So sorry for your loss. Your positive attitude is so inspirational, though. What a year, huh? I know 2012 is kicking my butt and it’s trying to do a number on you, too. But you’re not letting it. The photo of that truck is awesome!! Not that I didn’t enjoy the others, but that one leapt off the page. 🙂

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  7. lisleman Avatar

    I see the picture of your happy mom and think those candles are burning for everyone. Great post. The trick is to enjoy the light of the flame without getting burnt.

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  8. Suldog Avatar

    My sincere condolences on the passing of Your Uncle.
    You’ve got the right attitude, though, that’s for sure. Lap at the bowl until the last drop of milk is gone.

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  9. beth Avatar

    oh sweetie….
    your plate has been full lately and i just wanted to say, wow. you have the most strength of anyone i’ve seen lately, dealing with life and family…..so now, take sometime for yourself and let us continue with the prayers we’ve been sending your way….xo

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  10. Barbara Shallue Avatar

    That's so sweet, Beth, but I sure don't think of myself as strong. Or patient. I am learning to take things a day at a time – for the most part. I really would love to go dancing, though. Thank you so much for your prayers, sweet friend!
     

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  11. Barbara Shallue Avatar

    Thank you, Jim. I know you have that attitude, too!
     

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  12. Barbara Shallue Avatar

    I love that, Bill…to enjoy the light of the flame without getting burnt. Perfect!

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  13. Barbara Shallue Avatar

    2012 has been full of challenges for me, but I think it's been full of bigger changes and challenges for you, and you have truly been an inspiration to me as I go through all of this. Thank you for your positive attitude!! That truck does pop, doesn't it? I was tempted to tone it down a little but thought, heck no, let it shout!

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  14. Barbara Shallue Avatar

    Thank you, Ms. A. I've always been a lover of photos, and I'm grateful to those who captured the ones from our past. I'm glad I can help record these moments for my friends and families and myself, in photo and word.
     

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  15. Wolf Pascoe Avatar

    I love the photo of the red leaf, the others turning brown. Perfect, the sweet sadness and abundance of fall. Blessings to you.

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  16. Barbara Shallue Avatar

    Autumn is too symbolic at times, isn't it? Hope you have a blessed Thanksgiving!

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  17. Agnes Avatar

    It’s been a challenging year for you Barbara. I admire your strength as I am sure many other people do.

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  18. Barbara Shallue Avatar

    I give credit for any strength to God!  I'm actually a big whiny-baby wimp. 🙂

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  19. Stelle Courney Avatar

    I don’t think it’s a coincidence that the gate was open that time. I think fate decided that you needed some cheering up, so it sent these beautiful old cars and trucks to make you happy, even for just a moment. Your post here is truly meaningful. I also remember the time when my only concern was missing the cartoon program I wanted to watch. Now, there are the utility bills, the mortgage, and the groceries to worry about! I wish I could go back to that time, but I know we all have to inevitably grow up. This is late, but I’d like to say my condolences to your family for your loss. Don’t worry, your Uncle Bobby is now in a better place, together with my Mom. 🙂

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